Roses are red, poems are corny,
The way you go down on me, makes me so horny!

Ding Dong, the bitch is dead!

Well...retiring at least...:)

Pepsi = orgasm in your mouth.

I am going to punch this old lady in the face.

Can someone please tell me why the lesbian got a boyfriend before me??

Well, it took me til the end of college, but I'm finally starting to learn how to make friends. Now....if I could just learn how to find a boyfriend...

Don't deny what the world gives you, it does it for a reason.

Trying to control the world is an exhausting waste of time. Learn to roll with the punches.

Not Facebook Appropriate

So this is now going to become my haven for posting statuses that I don't think are appropriate to post on facebook, due to the people that may see it. So here starts number 1.

I don't believe in men that aren't douche bags. I don't believe they exist. Every man has at least an ounce of douchyness in them.